


A Vrisky Xmas

by Kryptronics



Series: What happens after the credits... [4]
Category: Homestuck, MS Paint Adventures
Genre: Christmas Presents, Christmas Shopping, F/M, Flushed Romance | Matesprits, John Egbert/Terezi Pyrope Kismesissitude, Minor Kismesissitude, Minor Terezi Pyrope/Karkat Vantas, custom items, lame christmas jokes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-30
Updated: 2017-01-17
Packaged: 2018-09-13 11:15:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,507
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9121141
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kryptronics/pseuds/Kryptronics
Summary: John is looking for the perfect gift for Vriska, whilst she struggles with what she's getting him and maybe her.





	1. Shopping trials

You walk around the shopping centre, you are faced with a conundrum it's Christmas and you Mr. John Egbert have yet to get your Girlfriend/ matesprit a Christmas present! Dave has tagged along and Karkat came too, loudly protesting that this was "FUCK ASSERY WHY DO YOU HUMANS NOT APPRECIATE 12TH PERIGREES RIGHT!" You thought this would be easy... just get her an 8 ball or something with 8 on it, so why was this so difficult.

You originally tried a jewellery shop in the hopes that they might have something that would suit her taste, but since she'd split with her old matesprit Meenah the idea of gold jewellery made her angry or pissed off, so there'd only been a small selection and even then it didn't quite seem right. Whilst you were in there Dave had flashed some cash and got a new watch for himself, with the statement "Time is so on my side today!" Sometimes you wish Dave would drop the 'irony' but hey that's part of what made Dave, well Dave. Karkat had then told him to stick it where the sun doesn't shine, but Dave had merely responded that 'he'd rather not wear a watch under his stiller sunglasses.'

You all left, searching along the top floor for a shop that would sell something. Dave suggested you should get her lingerie, and you had considered it. Kanaya cooperatively owned a shop on the lower floors that specialised in high quality clothing. Kanaya and her sister Porrim were amazing, and you were almost tempted to but something made you almost uneasy at the idea of walking into that shop. You'd done it once, though that had been when you, Jake, Jade and Jane had all been invited to the opening party. It had been a great time, but had got a hair awkward when Jane, Jade and all the girls present had been fitted for custom underwear whilst the party was still going on.

You passed by a gift shop and impulsively bought a joke 8 ball that gave dim answers like 'It almost positively must certainly not be not, not be the thing that it may actually seem to be.' How they fit the answers on was a mystery to you, but it seemed like a great gift until Karkat had explained how it "FUCKING CLEARLY WASN'T YOU ASSHAT!" You still didn’t return it, it might make a nice side gift if you found something awesome.

Dave had then insisted on going into a sex shop, you had scowled at the idea but Karkat seemed oddly intent on pretending he didn't want to go, whilst pushing you both in the direction of the shop with all his knightly strength. You'd arrived at the shop, Karkat slightly out of breath from his effort at moving you to this location, Dave had just walked alongside pretending he didn't know either of you.

You entered and were met with a plethora of sex toys, nudie mags and porno DVDs. Dave instantly found a white fluffy tail butt plug and with a grin walked up to you "fancy trying one? No homo!" you had laughed hopping he was joking and busied yourself with inspecting what Karkat was looking at, which turned out to be police and criminal costumes. He noticed you looking and turned scarlet in the face and mumbled something about "TEREZI SAID SHE LIKED ROLEPLAY." Though thankfully, that subject had never come up in your kissmisitude with her.

Dave had actually bought the butt plug and a few other things he claimed "Bro was needing for his productions." Though you did see him put a stamina kit in his bag that you were pretty sure would be little to no use for one of Bro's puppets. Karkat had tried to discreetly purchase a pair of handcuffs which Dave had noticed, he'd still bought them but only under the protest that he'd use them for training himself how to get out of them in case Terezi ever put him in some. You however had bought nothing. Not even the spider nipple pasties that Dave had insisted you get her, or even the book on 101 sex with Troll positions for Human dummies that Karkat had recommended, you asked him if he'd bought a copy to which he responded "THE FUCK, EGBERT IM NOT LENDING YOU MY COPY, WHAT IF MY FUCKASS OF A COPY HAS NOTES ON IT THAT ASSHATS LIKE YOUR SELF HAVE NO BUISNESS READING!" You'd smiled to yourself and thought what a great prank it would be to find it and doctor some of Karkat's notes in his copy.

After that Dave had turned to you a serious face on, one of his eyebrows dangerously high above his sunglasses. "Bro you seriously need to get your spider queen something better than that lame ass joke 8 ball!" You'd nodded and agreed with him, though it was at that point that both he and Karkat had tied a makeshift blind fold on you and dragged you off to the next shop.

When the blind fold was removed you found yourself in a clothes shop. Most of the space in the shop was taken up by a divider which allowed patrons to go behind to be measured in privacy. Kanaya and Porrim's shop. Porrim stood behind the counter her face one of bemused interest and slight humour. Dave had then spoken up "my man here needs some new threads for his girl." To which Karkat had added "IT'S FOR VRISKA BY THE WAY SO FUCKING LACY AND SPIDER THEMED ARE A FUCK YES!" Porrim nods at you a small smile making her lip ring catch the light. "Okay then well I will see if her measurements are recent eno+ugh to+ design so+me thing special, I take it yo+u were thinking lingerie?"

Your cheeks are almost on fire at how fast the situation had progressed, in your head you cycled the mantra 'what would Nicolas Cage do?' This helped a bit, though you weren't sure that suddenly turning into a flaming skulled hell rider would actually do anything in this situation; except look kind of cool in a really dorky way, reciting the alphabet out loud in a mocking voice wouldn't help either or even shouting "Take cover child, now switch to Kryptonite!" Then screaming in pain would do anything more than confuse the heck out of all the people in the room and land you in the nut house over Christmas.

Porrim has already got out a few pages of references, she looks at you "yo+u are in luck Mr. Egbert; she o+nly recently go+t herself a new bra fro+m us so+, we have her measurements o+n file, any designs yo+u were thinking o+f?" you begin to muse it over before Dave comes out with "can it say spider tits on the bra and a black widow hourglass on the ass?" Porrim gives him a frown "whilst what yo+u have suggested is po+ssible I do+n't think it wo+uld be in my interests to+ make such a degrading design, even if she may have at o+ne po+int asked fo+r a design surprisingly similar to+ what yo+u just described." Karkat grins at her and you shake your head at the silliness of Dave's comment.

You think for a bit, then an idea forming in your head you begin to hash out a plan for a design. Porrim takes notes and sketches a few designs on a whiteboard she kept behind the counter. You all input into the design as a custom set of lingerie is created specifically for your matesprit and her arachna-philic tastes.

 

 

==> Be Vriska

You've 8een searching this dum8 shopping centre for a while, you'd 8rought along Terezi and Jane 8ecause who’d know John 8etter than his ecto-mom/grandma........ and Terezi although she was John's Kismesis was still good company and a laugh, or eight.

It turned out that Jane was a 8it of a prude. She'd gone scarlet and nearly passed out from em8arrassment when you'd suggested going to a sex shop. Though Terezi hadn't been much 8etter, she had declared "1 c4n no long3r 3nt3r th4t shop3, 1 w4s b4nn3d from th3r3; 4s 4pp4r3ntly th3y t4k3 off3nc3 wh3n you l1ck th3 1t3ms on s4l3."

So that had ruled that out there, you have 8een traipsing around the centre checking out pretty much everything and anything. Terezi had to almost 8odily pull you away from a joke '8 ball' which just had your name written on it! It was when you were all eating 8urgers at the food court that you spotted a store selling movies, you flicked through most of the selection, though no Nic. Cage flicks appeared to you, even when you tried 8oosting your luck.

Dusk fell fairly quickly after you left the video store, signalling time to give up and go home, you all piled into Jane's car. Usually you'd drive, but Jane had insisted she wanted to 8e useful and free chauffeuring was not something you'd say no to.

"So d1d w3 got 4ny th1ng don3 tod4y?" Terezi asks in a 8ored voice, she's stretched out in the 8ack of the car her seatbelt 8arely on. "Well I got a nice set of pans for cooking this year's cake in." Jane exclaims happily. "8ut I didn't get anything for Joooooooohn!" you moan. "You know you 4lw4ys h4v3 th4t on3 opt1on, h3 h3." Terezi cackles. Jane goes red "Terezi, I'm sure Vriska will be able to find John a lovely Christmas present, without resorting to such..." Terezi's laughter cuts her off. You just scowl at the 8lind girl for a minute, 8efore realising the futility of that action.

You have to admit it to yourself the easy option was appealing and it would make 8oth of you happy, 8ut you just had a feeling that your luck would be kicking in and you would 8e getting a great present from John and although you, with most people would 8e fine with taking a great present from them and giving them virtually nothing, it's not the Same with John. John you actually give a damn a8out for a start. You still try to show him how tough you are, you just find that around him you can 8e yourself and he doesn't mind in fact seems to enjoy just 8eing with you as much as you enjoy 8eing around him.

You've changed a lot since the whole session ended: you got Dave to time rewind your tattoo and piercings; not for John 8ut 8ecause they reminded you of Meenah, though as a 8onus John had said you'd looked 8eautiful right after the procedure when he'd walked into Dave's flat (you weren't dating at that point though). You were still the kick ass girl you'd always 8een, you just for the first time in a while were free to 8e you and not have some dum8 quest or jo8 distracting you from you.

Jane's voice suddenly 8reaks you from your reverie, Vriska, Vriska yoo hoo. Erm it does seem silly mentioning this, but you were just sat there a distant look in your eyes and a strange smile on your face." You 8link reasoning returning to your ticking mind, what are you Aradia! Your mind doesn't tick, it puts irons in the fire and they damn well come out red hot! Regardless you smile your nicest I just goofed smile and laugh "Oh was I, I didn't realise. Lost in my thoughts, this lack of a present is 8othering me." She gives a nod, her eyes are on the road as all good drivers' should 8e, then a thoughtful look crosses her kind face "I might just have an idea." She mutters.

That idea seems to be pure unsolicited 8ull shit! You, Terezi and Jane are stood in front of Equius, Horuss, Jake and Dirk's house, for some reason they 8ought a house together and now you are stood outside the damn place. Jane rings the bell, whilst Terezi wrinkles her nose "oh gog no! W3'r3 4t th1s bulg3 suck1ng h1v3." You just shake your head, 8 times to make sure everyone knows you aren't looking forward to this.

The door is answered by Horuss, the internal door kno8 is dented and slightly off shape as if repaired regularly, he looks out at you his mouth a line of 8lankness "yes?" his expression lifts slightly at the sight of Jane "oh miss Crocker what brings you to our stable. Do you perhaps wish to try some ambrosia I have recently trotted on to the recipe for, or maybe you are here for the Jake human..." her hand almost flash steps over his mouth and an uncharacteristic look that almost says 'say anything more and I will hurt you' flits over her face for a second 8ut it's enough time for 8oth you and Horuss to see, Terezi has her nose in the letter8ox and is giggling about something. "erm well come in then." Horuss motions for you to enter.

You enter and notice Equius looking curiously over, he lets out a small sigh of grief as he sees you. oh yeah the last time you saw the sweaty, inferiority complex mechanic properly, when he wasn't a glasses com8o ghost, was when he was trying to fix your gog damn arm or something... you probably saw him after that, you just don't remem8er or actually care. Jane walks over to Equius and 8egins talking in hushed voices. You stick your head out of the door and whine at Terezi to get her 8utt inside.

Terezi walks in a devious grin on her face. You, realising that Jane is expecting you to 8e here for a while, scout around for a pair of unoccupied seats. Horuss you notice has gone over to Jane and Equius and is thoughtfully ru88ing his chin and sometimes adding comments to their conversation.

A few minutes later you and Terezi are sat on stools in a kitchen like workshop, is everyone in this damn hive a freaking mechanic!? Finally after you were getting so 8ored that the thought, Jane had 8rought you here in some strange way of trying to make you wane 8lack for her was starting to form, Jane rushes in.

She's got a goofy smile on her face and her glasses are flashing excitedly. "We've got it Vriska! Hoo hoo are you gonna make john happy this Christmas!" you look up almost happy to have something happen. Terezi, who had almost fallen asleep, head resting on the table 8olts up, glasses somewhat askew. W3 c4n go hom3?" she asks in somewhat groggy excitement. "Not yet TZ, we gotta hear what the 8uxom 8a8e wants to tell us. Then we pro8a8ly have to sit through hours of Equius explaining whatever they've thought of, whilst sweating his 8ulge off over the thought of what me and john are going to use it for. I just hope that it's not just another 8loody horse shlong, his 8rother is o8sessed with them!!!!!!!!" You reply a yawn of tiredness punctuating your sentence. "C'mon you two!" She enthuses a dorky smile posted to her face. You slowly stand form your chair, 8ones clicking from the inactivity. After a small stretch you and Terezi follow Jane through to the main workshop. Horuss, Equius and Dirk, who apparently just showed up, are all sat round a 8lue print coated work table you hadn't noticed as you were entering.

The three of you sit at the table, the 8oys all look up as you do. Only Horuss smiles, but Dirk does nod to you and Jane 8y way of greeting. Equius smoothes out a 8lue print and then looking nervous nudges Dirk, who gives him a 'I just got here shrug', and starting to sweat slightly, then turns to Horuss who gives him a unsu8tle and unhelpful thum8s up of support.

He then clears his throat "Erm, well we have been moolling over possibilities, of what might erm... 'assist' in your activities with the John human, the thought of which... I am uncomfortable..." at this point it's obvious the muscle 8ound metal monger is going to 8e tripping over his words for the next 8 hours if you let him continue. You give Dirk your most imploring look; he stone faces you, though when you turn on some of that Serket luck, he releases a small sigh and pats Equius to shut up as he's started sweating like a 8ovine in the hot house. Just what the fuck is this gizmo they're trying to come up with.

"Ok, Serket the thing these bro's and I mean bro's as they kind of are, anyway have been trying to devise a sort of 'sex toy' or something to improve your lovin' on my bro's Bro." he gives you a nod and you give him a dirty look, all he did was make you look stupid and say exactly what Equius just said "soooooooo?" you ask slightly annoyed, "have you 8rain 8oxes actually come up with anything helpful or are you still traumatically struggling with the image of me and John 8umping uglies!!!!!!!!?" at that statement Equius shuffles off for a towel, Horuss just smiles and Dirk nods an affirmative.

Jane sighs "They actually do have an idea. They're just being, well... themselves."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I wrote this over Christmas it's an add on to the 'What happens after the credits...' series but doesn't quite fit in any real point in time.  
> Apparently I think nicolas cage sounds like John Egbert... this is news to all readers including me.  
> Ok, I put it in John's colours as it's john imagining himself saying it not a direct memory from KICK-ASS.  
> This work should hopefully be finnished and uploaded just after the new year so look forward to that.


	2. Gifts and talks

Christmas Eve

== > Be John

So you made it, your gifts are wrapped and safely under Vriska’s tree!  You’re spending Christmas Eve round hers and Terezi’s. Karkat is going to be staying over too; it’s really starting to look like a great holiday. You called up Jane, Jade, Jake, and of course Dad, all of whom had plans allowing yours to play out like a light breeze. Jade was of course going round Bro’s to spend the holiday with Dave, Jane mumbled something about cooking, Jake was going to be having a ‘rip roaring time’ with his workshop chums and Dad was expecting the lovely Mom Lalonde over, so no worries about him or any of them spending the holidays alone, well save Jane but it had been a very quick mumble of “Baking” which told you she might have a few plans she might not want to share.

You are sat on the couch, Karkat next to you, a glass of eggnog in hand; probably laced with 8 year aged bourbon whisky. Vriska was doing a lot of the cooking this year, not that everyone didn’t trust Terezi it’s just the last time she’d tried to cook; you’d all been given strawberry straws in marinara sauce with a sprinkling of red skittles, not something you’d be queuing up for again.

There’s a Nic Cage Christmas film on the TV; The Family Man. Karkat is enraptured by the acting prowess of Nic Cage playing an investment broker, then suddenly having a family and kids. Vriska keeps popping her head round the door in a futile attempt to try and keep up with the story. Terezi isn’t anywhere to be seen which is either really good news or really bad news.

 you and she had agreed that; this Christmas was for matesprits,  so there would be no grievances over people not feeling the love and instead being cut out through a kismesitude deepening. So that was partly why you felt so relaxed, usually you’d keep a pranksters gambit open just in case Terezi might have tried to spike your eggnog with Tabasco sauce, or she could be setting up an ingenious yet pointless shenanigan where you prepared yourself for the worst then it turned out it was just a ruse to annoy you, you kinda hated her for those and it was so hard to tell the difference between the a pointless shenanigan and a real McCoy! However it had been a solemn promise so hopefully she was keeping her end up, you half-were; you had a stun ring in your pocket just in case a ruse was floated into your festivities.

Vriska finally saunters in, a cloth draped over her shoulder and a festive T-shirt on saying ‘8itches love Santa 8a8y!’ with a picture of troll, cerulean blood, Santa with a pair of troll females draped over his arms. “Have I missed anything much?” she asks. Karkat nods “YEAH ‘THE CAGE’ IS HAVING SERIOUS ISSUES ABOUT WHAT HE ACTUALLY WANTS AND WHETHER THE KATE HUMAN IS RIGHT ABOUT THE LIFE THEY LIVE BEING FUCKING AWESOME OR SOMETHING.” She blinks for a minute, puts a hand to her head “I was only gone 8 minutes, this film is supposed to 8e an easy to follow comedy romp!” she announces to the room in general, before sauntering over to you her hips swaying in the motion you are so familiar with, she wants something. 

She sits comfortably on your lap, her body presses into yours as she leans her head gently on your shoulder. You enjoy the closeness for a few minutes as she tries to get a feel for what is going on in the film, you lean in for a kiss but a finger taps your nose. “Not quite yet lover 8oy, I still have Yorkshire pudding 8atter that needs 8aking.”  And with that she’s up and off back to the kitchen. Karkat gives you a mock tragic look, and then bursts out laughing at the expression on your face.

Terezi saunters in she’s dressed, but looks like a slightly frazzled Christmas cracker; a slightly scruffy bright red jumper with  ‘m3rry Chr1stm4s you f1lthy 4n1m4l!’  written in yellow with scalemates printed in repeating patterns along the top and bottom, her glasses are slightly askew and her hair is a birds nest.

“R3m1nd m3 to s3nd l4tul4’s gog d4mnd g1fts n3xt y34r!” she growls. Karkat looks over at her “WHICH BUSH DID THE BARKBEAST DRAG YOU THROUGH?” her face lightens at the gruff and loud voice. “W3ll 1f 1 h4d known th4t my s1st3rs m4t3spr1t w4s so hyp3d 4bout chr1stm4s 1 would h4v3 just st4y3d 4t th3 door. But *no*, *d3t3ct1v3* T3r3z1 just h4d to go 1n 4nd s4y h1!” she begins muttering obscenities under her breath. You feel kinda shitty, you care about her wellbeing and it sucks that she had a bad time at her sisters, but it’s Karkat’s time to be hero. He gets up and sweeps her off her feet, that really gets her laughing “oh my br4v3 kn1ght h4s sw3pt m3 off my f33t, 4nd 1t’s not 3v3n chr1stm4s y3t!” He smiles and carefully plants an affectionate kiss on her smiling lips.

The movie ends just as Vriska sticks her head in. “8ugger!” she exclaims as she sees the ending credits. Her eyes swivel around the room and lock on the happy couple then at your lonely Christmassy ass and a grin pulls over her mouth. “wow I thought it was called a kismesitude not a cuckatude, I didn’t realise that turned you on Egbert!” she laughs. Your face heats up; you hadn’t been really paying attention to Terezi and Karkat, but Vriska being well… Vriska, was trying to stir things as per usual. 

Terezi and Karkat just throw up a reversed peace sign in unison, you second it with a playful middle finger, but hey Vriska’s cheerfully laughing at the sight, a camera already snapping a picture of the swearing inhabitants of the room. 

“Dinner is ready 8y the way” she announces, and then walks into the room and standing in front of you holds out a hand to help you up. You switch the hand holding the eggnog mug and take her soft hand, her foot lightly treads on yours and you lift yourself up, lightly feeling her giving small pulling effort. Still holding your hand she leads you to the kitchen. The table is pre-prepared; Terezi apparently did it before running over to Latula’s to deliver gifts.

You are placed next to Karkat and across from Vriska; this is probably one of Vriska’s inputs as although the whole Troll romance is kind of second nature to three fourths of the attending company, your experience is kind of new so needs work on social boundaries and to where and what is appropriate.

A plate of food is placed in front of you, it looks amazing, you smile “wow Vriska this looks incredible, I can’t wait to try it!” Vriska smiles and pecks your cheek as she straightens up and proceeds to place similar plates of food in front of everyone else. Once everyone is served Vriska takes a seat and offers the end of a cracker to you, smiling you take the end of it. A crack issues as the cardboard breaks and the silver fulminate is detonated.

Three more cracks ring out as the rest of the crackers are pulled: Karkat wins a fortune fish, that lays unmoving in his hand no matter how much he pokes it; Terezi win’s a set of miniature screwdrivers, which she pockets subtly whilst ‘looking’ in your general direction, a small smile on her face; and Vriska wins a set of 9 small D6 dice in the first then a blue plastic whistle in the second, though she hands that to you with a laugh of “trust me you have a 8etter present later!”

Dinner goes down well, lame jokes are told. You add your own; as the one you got given from the second cracker Vriska won was ‘what’s brown and sticky?: A stick.’ which although a classic is still terrible, so ‘Did you know that Microsoft has a monopoly?: yeah, Santa’s traded chimneys for Windows.’ Took your original gag’s place in a display of your prowess at the art of witticism.  Vriska’s wasn’t too bad ‘who doesn’t eat on Christmas?: A turkey 8ecause it’s stuffed.’ though you are sure Terezi made hers up because ‘why 1s S4nt4 such 4 jolly m4n?: B3c4us3 h3 knows wh3r3 4ll th3 n4ughty g1rls l1v3.’ probably wouldn’t have passed a ‘sociably acceptable’ test with a cracker production line, even if it did make everyone at the table laugh. Karkat’s one was unfortunately utter shit ‘WHAT DO YOU GET IF YOU CROSS A SNOWMAN AND THE SUN?: A PUDDLE.’   

Dessert was then served up by, a still slightly fuming at the lameness of his joke, Karkat. This part had apparently been made by Karkat and Terezi; it was a large Christmas cake wrapped in red icing with ‘IT 1s 3RD p3r1gr33s YOU h34th3ns!’ written in yellow icing. The decoration gets a laugh and the cake is quickly sliced into. According to Karkat most of the finding the recipe and ingredients was his department, though he mentioned that Terezi had insisted that red cherries and red raisins had to be included in the fruit cake base’s creation. The end result tasted great! Terezi’s nose had apparently allowed her to smell when the cake was perfectly cooked through. Karkat recounted how had to hold Terezi off whilst putting the layer of red icing over the marzipan, the writing had also been a cooperative effort hence the change in quirk every word.

After dessert you all traipse back into the living room arranging your selves on the sofa; Terezi one end, you with Vriska sat snugly on you the other end, and Karkat sat in the middle. 

A typical Christmas movie is put on and everyone proceeds to not give a fuck about it, you and Vriska cuddle up her raven hair tickling your nose as she leans against your shoulder, you look over and Karkat and Terezi are already lost in make out land, party of two. You consider kissing Vriska again but last time you’d tried still weighs on your mind. You look at her, she’s looking at you… well this is awkward. You look at her lips; they’re smoothly coated in a cerulean blue lipstick. You look up to her eyes, her eight, just finishing going cerulean, eyes softly look back. You glance down at her lips again, they’re slightly parted. A grey hand reaches up to your cheek; it gently makes contact, and then with the barest of force begins to direct you towards her face.

Your lips meet her waiting smile, as you turn your head slightly to avoid clashing noses. You close your eyes and sink into the kiss. Swirling and tapping each other’s tongues you enjoy the intimacy and closeness. It’s not until Karkat shouts “GET A FUCKING ROOM!” that you actually realise how into the moment you and Vriska were getting. Vriska looks up, a blush of cerulean tinting her features, giving her a cute glow you rarely get to see. You turn back to the lame movie, and Vriska after making an obscene gesture at Karkat does so too. 

Terezi breaks the idle staring at the TV, asking “so wh4t t1m3 1s 1t th3n?” you glance at your watch, its only 10 minutes to midnight, but Vriska has already called out the time before your mind even gets into gear. Karkat looking ponderous suggests “SO IF IT GETS PAST FUCKING MIDNIGHT, WOULD IT BE WRONG TO OPEN ONE FUCKINGPRESENT?” you have no objections and Vriska is nodding her agreement, Terezi voices an objection “but th4t m34ns w3 w1ll h4v3 l3ss pr3s3nts tomorrow?” Vriska responds with an incredulous “so!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?”“1 w4s just s4y1ng.” she grumbles “1 4ctu4lly l1k3 th3 1d34! Th3r3’s so much r3d und3r th3 tr33, 1t’s t4k1ng 4ll my w1ll pow3r not to go roll 1n 1t!” “WELL WHAT IF IT’S ONE FUCKING PRESENT AND ONLY ONE! FROM YOUR MATESPRIT, DOES THAT MAKE THINGS LESS… FUCKING PROBLEMATIC?” Karkat adds “oh you h4v3 such 4 w4y w1th words.” Terezi coos slightly sarcastically, though the affection seems to be received as Karkat doesn’t give her any snark back. 

The clock ticks closer to midnight. Terezi quietly hums what sounds like the twelve days of Christmas but around what sounds like ‘six geese a-laying’ she sounds like she’s making chainsaw noises. Vriska flicks out a pack of cards and you idly begin playing Hearts with her, Terezi and Karkat. The games finish with Terezi on 109 making her the loser, Karkat on 78 somehow obtaining second place, you unfortunately scored 98 and it was only Terezi’s misfortune of getting the Queen of spades in the last round that she’d lost and of course Vriska won with a score of 38, though none of you had been playing seriously, even Vriska, it would have been no powers and you all might have actually paid more attention.

Vriska’s eyes flick up to the clock a knowing smile fits its self casually on her face, “Oooooooh John, looooooook at the time!!!!!!!!” she croons excitement filling her voice. Karkat looks up and with a smile on his face, turns to you and Vriska and wishes you both a happy Christmas. He then turns to Terezi. Who’s looking slightly miffed at not being the first one he wished seasons tidings too, but her face softens as he plants a firm kiss on her lips and whispers happy Christmas to her. Vriska turns to you a grin on her face and says “so then one present, I can’t wait to see what you got me!!!!!!!!” Her eyes sparkle with excitement as you walk over to the tree, your hand hovers over the 8 ball but your head (both of them) say that this is the time for more personal gifts.

You carefully pickup the present. Vriska’s present. The present for Vriska. Vriska’s custom hand crafted lingerie. The present containing the custom lingerie. Yeah you got her covered. You, Terezi, Karkat and Vriska are sat by the tree, each holding a present for their matesprit. You hand yours carefully to Vriska smiling “Happy Christmas Vriska.” She takes it then slowly starts to unwrap it. It’s been decided that gifts will be given in turn, with the order being; girls first, then boys.

 Vriska lets out a breath of astonishment and delight, she holds up the bra first it is mostly dark black though this is broken up by web patterns sewn around the straps and the cups are adorned with a embroidered cerulean Scorpio symbol on one side and a depiction of a set of 8 cerulean 8 sided dice. The webbing design also makes up most of the cups, with the web being a black outline with a white centre. The gaps in the web are unfilled; meaning when worn the wearers flesh would be visible through them. she then holds up the panties another breath of delight being loosed from her lips as she takes in the careful, high quality handmade design; these are also black with the web design around the sides, the crotch piece depicts a ship with a cerulean 8 emblazoned onto its grey sails and a jolly Roger flying, on the back panel a blood red hour glass, designed to just sit in between the wearers cheeks, that was thanks to Dave’s suggestion ‘that the ass needed something just a tad ironic’ and the red hourglass surrounded by the net web pattern just seemed to fit. Vriska almost flies at you. You slow her down slightly using your wind powers, her lips find yours and you gently bring her down to the floor again. “w3ll wh1lst you two 4r3 3njoy1ng 34t1ng 34ch oth3r’s f4c3s, w3 h4v3 4 f3w mor3 pr3s3nts to go through!”  Terezi comments a slight note of annoyance in her voice. You straighten up and Vriska casually leans against you one arm around you, a satisfied smile on her face.  Karkat hands Terezi her present, a slight red blush on his grey features. She takes it, smells it, and then slowly opens it. A box is revealed, she opens the box her mouth curling into a delighted smile. Inside is a bottle of red liquid and a red lipstick all set into a red velveteen packing. “IT’S UH, CHERRY CANDY FLAVOUR LIPSTICK AND STRAWBERRY SCENTED PERFUME, I REMEMBER YOU COMMENTING ON THE SCENT WHEN WE WENT THROUGH A COSMETIC SHOP.” Karkat mumbles, looking shyly at his matesprit. She removes the lipstick and uncaps it. Twisting the stick to allow application she deftly coats her lips, and then places a Red kiss mark straight on Karkat’s reddening cheek. “1 lov3 1t.” she says.

She then hands Karkat a neatly wrapped present, he carefully opens it. Inside is a book he looks up and is about to say thank you when Terezi cuts him off “op3n 1t” she instructs a smile curling on her face. He opens the book to the first page inside in neat handwriting is a dedication from the author “^o Karka^ Van^as, I am deligh^ed ^o sign ^his book for you. Your ma^espri^ ^ells me ^ha^ ^his is your favouri^e book. She insis^ed I wri^e in red, which is a firs^ for me, ^hough i^ brough^ a huge smile ^o her face when I brough^ ou^ a red pen. I hope you enjoy my wri^ings and con^inue ^o keep ^his lovely lady sa^isfied as i^’s clear ^o me she cares for you to the <=sky=>, yours in Wri^ing” then the author had signed her name and symbol in indigo ink. Karkat’s mouth is wide enough to drive a train through “YOU WENT AND MET HER AND NOT ONLY THAT! GOT HER TO NOT ONLY SIGN, BUT GET A FULL DEDICATION AS WELL… I AM… I THINK… I LOVE YOU!” he stumbles out. She smiles “on3 mor3 p4rt.” He looks down again, in between the second and third pages a photo of Terezi and the author both blowing a kiss towards the camera is found. Words fail him and he’s only able to brush a red tear of happiness away. Terezi leans over and they share a kiss. You smile and Vriska pulls a mock face of disgust.

 Clearing her throat Vriska calls for attention, “So I had to do a 8it of looking around for this one, 8ut it’s a 8iiiiiiiig one, a one of a kind, something that can oooooooonly be used once!!!!!!!!” This phrasing is puzzling you; the present Vriska is holding doesn’t look particularly big about the size of a brick. She holds it out towards you, a look of almost nervousness passes across her face and her hand wobbles slightly. You take the present. Her eyes follow it as it travels to your lap. You carefully unwrap the present and look at the gift, it’s a thick cardboard box. You slide the lid up and carefully remove it. Vriska looks as if your next move could be a fatality to her. Inside the box, carefully padded in, is a sort of gun and one small glass bottle filled with a glowing straw coloured liquid.

A look of nonplussed lack of understanding arrives at your face in short order. “Erm Vriska…….. what is it????????” you ask. Her face is pale and she croaks a bit before carefully starting to speak. “Well that’s an injector, it works on trolls thicker skin and can penetrate deep to internal organs etc. the 8ottle of liquid is the main gift.” She pauses and looks like she’s steeling herself up for the next part. “It’s not for now. Jane took me and Terezi to visit Dirk and Co. and since Jane was there this was suggested and now here it is.” You tilt your head in confusion, she’s talking plenty about how she got it but the actual purpose of the liquid is beyond your comprehension, though what Jane has to do with it you aren't sure. All you can puzzle out so far is the liquid is injected deep into a troll and that’s the long and short of your comprehension. “It’s a mixture of a few peoples god powers processed through a void channel to remove certain unwanted aspects.” She continues. Something about the mixture and Jane being involved triggers some thoughts, though you wait to see if your impossible deduction is confirmed. “It’s a ‘life’ serum; it in theory would re-work some of a troll’s internal biology to facilitate a stable hybrid wiggler to be created inside of the troll.” That confirms your deduction but something is up, why is Vriska being so vague in the specifics on who it should be used on. “Vriska why do you keep saying troll and not you?” you ask earnestly. Her eyes all turn to you, the corners well up slightly “8ecause… 8ecause I am afraid you wouldn’t want to use it with me.” She mewls quietly. Terezi and Karkat have gone silent; Karkat just looks gob smacked, whilst Terezi looks on an impassive expression on her face.

Understanding dawns upon you, “Vriska” you start. You look at her and gently take her hands between your own. Tears of a translucent cerulean now roll down her face “I didn’t even think this was even possi8le. The idea of a hy8rid wiggler and not just that, a wiggler that is 8orn of me and you was a concept 8eyond imagining, and Well when Jane suggested the serum and I was just thinking something sexy to make carnal pleasures 8etter, I wasn’t sure, 8ut then the reality hit me and I dunno, I wanted to have it, to hold the possibility, and then to give it to you.”

You nod. The concept of children with your matesprit was something you’d not even thought possible since the days of your first attraction to her all of those years ago and had no ideas on the restrictions of Troll - human biology. It’s a lot to take in, you remove the bottle and hold it up to the light, It shines and writhes almost as if it its self is alive. You give her a smile and replacing the bottle into the box, pull her in for a warm embrace.

Terezi is looking in your general direction and you notice her give a subtle head nod to indicate she wants a chat outside. you get the message and her hair is subtly hit by five small breezes to indicate five minutes. Vriska, who is oblivious to you and your kismesis’s little chat, snuggles up warmly to you. You hug her back as Terezi says “1 n33d 4 c1g4r3tt3.” Karkat gives her an un-happy look “I SWORE YOU QUIT, YEARS AGO WHEN ARADIA DID.”  She sighs and pulls herself up “1t’s just on3, 1t’s not going to k1ll m3.” With that she’s left the room. You and Karkat briefly share a confused glance. You didn’t realise she’d started again, it’d been so long since she’d quit you’d almost forgotten she’d even once been a smoker.  Still you get up “8nd wh8r8 do you th8nk you 8re go8ng????????” Vriska asks a note of frustration in her voice “to take the bins out. The Jenga game you and Terezi are playing is all well and good, but it’s gonna fall and then the whole room will stink.” She relents with a roll of her eyes and pulls out the pack of cards which she then begins playing patience with. Karkat leans over to her and begins occasionally offering advice.

You leave the room and enter the kitchen. It’s still festively decorated and there, the bin in the corner; the contents balanced, in precarious precision like a tower. You grab the bag and pull it up to enclose the pillar of overflow, tying the bag up you heft it onto your shoulder and exit the flat. Going down three flights of stairs you reach the ground floor and head out the propped open back entrance towards the bins.

Terezi is waiting out there not smoking a cigarette as you had been lead to believe; damn she was full of these ruses. As you throw the trash in the communal bin outside she says  “so th4t s3rum 4r3 you go1ng to us3 1t w1th h3r?”  this is what you had been dreading “1 w4s th3r3 wh3n 1t w4s b31ng d3s1gn3d” she continues. You look puzzled “you’d want me to use it on you?” she pauses for a bit then says “1 wouldn’t s4y 1 h4d not g1v3n th4t ro4d 4 th1nk ov3r…” “But” you add in “y34h 1 know w3 4gr33d chr1stm4s 1s for m4t3spr1ts but, th1s tr4nc3nds just 4 hol1d4y 3v3nt John.” She reasons.  You close the bin and look her squarely in the eye. “You know try1ng to g1v3 m3 looks do3sn’t work” she comments. “Then how did you know if I was giving you one?” you cleverly retort. “S33r of m1nd, w1nd sock.” She bites back.  You have to give her that one. “So what did you want to say then, I shouldn’t use it with Vriska and use it with you?” you ask, slight tones of doubt and annoyance creeping into your voice. “No John, 1 just… 1 just w4nt you to know th4t 3v3n 1f you do us3 1t 4nd 1t do3snt work out, 1 st1ll h4t3 you.” Terezi finishes, you smile “yeah, hate you too!”  Her mouth pulls into her old slightly menacing grin and you head back up stairs, closing the door behind you locking her out.

When you are halfway up the second flight of stairs a cry of “GOG D4MM1t!” rings up to you, then “3GGB3RT, OP3N TH3 D4MN DOOR!” You walk into the flat a grin on your face and casually, as you walk into the living room, mention to Karkat that Terezi might be locked out. After face palming his hand he gets up and picking up a front door key, obviously he didn’t put it past you to lock them both out of the flat, he walks out to go let his matesprit in.

Vriska smiles at you “so you took the 8ins out ‘and’ pulled a Christmas prank, I am impressed.” You look at the neat set of four piles of cards. “So, I take it you won.” You state. “When do I not.” She grins back. You walk over and planting a kiss on her lips sit down next to her. A few minutes later Terezi and Karkat walk back in, Karkat is repressing a laugh and Terezi looks suitably annoyed.

An hour later you are all stuffed, from indulging on mince pies with warm brandy cream, and begin making your ways to bed. Vriska leads you to her room, and you both crash out on the double bed. Quickly you strip to your boxers and flop under the duvet. Vriska does a mock Striptease down to her cerulean underwear. Then with a flourish she’s fully topless. You get an eyeful of her breasts and cerulean nipples, before a black pyjama shirt/dress is pulled on. She then removes her panties and gets into bed with you, her arms pulling you into the big spoon position. “Night John, happy christmas.” She yawns. You respond in kind, squeezing her gently to show you’re there and care.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the final chapter it took a bit longer than I was expecting to write but still came out before Hiveswap!  
> I said at the begining this is a snap shot from some point in time from when the 'after the credits' takes place so this may be the far future or the coming present. This is partly why I decided to put in Vriska's present as what it was. I am not against the idea of fan trolls but I want to focus on the actual characters so the furthest I will go is mentioning a Troll or another human but give no real description, Terezi's present to Karkat is a stretch but I wanted it to be an actual dedication. Owing to my lack of creativity and making some one like Meulin the author seemed a little clichéd (not that she Isn't one! plenty of time for her story at some point) I went with coming up with a new quirk and a rough description of an Indigo Troll so there that's explained. ha ha...  
> As for the Jokes, I did actually have the misfortune of actually pulling Karkat's joke this christmas to which I was made to read it out... though I was probably less terse afterwards.  
> As to why no Vriska perspective I just decided not to...  
> Finally Terezi's ex-habbit; these are people who went through a lot, some people do tend to pick up vices after high stress events. Also I know a good few lawyers who smoke so it fit with some of my perceptions. However, I do wish to say she currently doesn't and probably won't be written in future stories, it was more of her excuse to leave and chat to john.


End file.
